Expanded State Infertility Mandates Show Promise for Same-Sex Couples, Here’s What You Need to Know to Get Coverage

The matching process is one of the most exciting points of any surrogacy journey. You’ve spent months working with your agency and getting to know each other, and when you receive your first surrogate profile, it’s an incredibly meaningful moment.

If you’re considering building your family, or starting to have that conversation with either your partner, your family, your friends, or a fertility provider, you may be consumed with questions such as, where to start? Do we pursue adoption, or biological family building? What legal concerns do I need to consider in order to protect my future child?

The surrogate matching process is incredibly intricate. Every successful surrogacy journey starts with a solid, right-fit match, so surrogacy agencies will take all the time they need to make sure they get to know both the surrogates and Intended Parents they’re working with.

Here at Gay Parents To Be, we have years of experience helping intended parents build their families through surrogacy, and we know that the process can be complicated and overwhelming, as well as incredibly and hopefully so rewarding.

When I was first asked to write this piece about donor sperm insemination and to discuss whether or not inseminations should be done at home or at a medical clinic, my initial reaction was “definitely at a medical clinic” for the best possible legal protection.

The schoolyard saying goes, “first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the baby carriage” - but we live in a society where that progression is largely outdated. Some singles and couples choose to start their families without considering marriage, while others wonder if children are even part of their future plan. But for Stef, she knew a year or so before she and her wife, Denise, got married.

For many LGBTQ moms to be, questions about how you’re going to build your family, either by yourself or with a partner, revolve around logistics. What are my options? Can my partner and I both be involved? How much is this going to cost? Will my insurance cover this? Here at Gay Parents To Be we have the team and the tools available to get you answers to those questions, but we also want you to feel empowered and in-the-know about your personal fertility.

Avoiding surrogacy’s legal pitfalls is easier than you think...

One of the biggest questions that we receive from LGBTQ couples and single parents-to-be using biological family methods is that of donor choice. Should I ask a friend to be my egg or sperm donor? How do I talk to my future child about their conception story, when it involves a donor? Each individual or couple who is hoping to use a donor as part of their family building should meet with a counselor, to discuss the ins and outs of the decision. We're lucky to have a team of experts in our Gay Parents To Be network, including two social workers who meet regularly with both intended parents and also potential donors! In the blog below, Lisa Schuman, licensed clinical social worker (LCSW), answers a question about whether a same-sex female couple should use an anonymous or known sperm donor.

Looking for an LGBTQ-friendly doctor can feel like a daunting part of the gay family-building process. Between choosing a path to parenthood, your egg/sperm donor choice, and any additional agency that you may need, we know that the choices involved in LGBTQ family building can seem overwhelming.

One of the choices you will navigate during your biological family building journey will be choosing a surrogate. Here at Gay Parents To Be, all intended parents using surrogacy to grow their families are equipped with a team that includes a specific nurse, navigator, financial advocate, as well as Dr. Leondires. Together, this team will counsel you on your journey and will connect you with a vetted surrogacy agency - whose job is to locate, prescreen, and match parents with surrogates, along with a whole host of other legal and administrative tasks.