I vividly remember this one specific night in 2017, during my sophomore year of college. I was lying in my twin bed in my dorm room, under the covers tossing and turning, knowing I wasn't going to sleep that night. It was the night I realized that my sexuality wasn't a choice and that I couldn't keep lying to myself anymore. For a lot of people, I imagine it's a pretty liberating feeling, but to me, it felt like a tremendous weight had settled on my shoulders. I could only think about the implications of this realization, and how much my future might differ from the one I had always imagined.