Build the Family of Your Dreams

GayParentsToBe is an LGBT family building resource for medical, legal, surrogacy and sperm donor services.

Choosing A Sperm Donor | The Process

For many women, the use of sperm from a donor is an option that can make pregnancy possible. Donor sperm can be obtained in various ways, depending on what the intended mom is most comfortable with; they are:

Known Donor is when a friend wants to give his sperm to help a single woman become a mom. Many family lawyers recommend having a contract between friends to outline the sperm donor’s involvement, rights and financial obligations in the family for the future.

Anonymous Donor can be found through a sperm bank. As the name implies, an intended mom does not know the Anonymous Donor, including his name or medical history. However, recipients can choose a sperm donor based on basic characteristics such as race, academic achievements, looks and other factors.

Identity Release Donor, which is sometimes called Open Door Donor, gives the child the option to contact the donor, typically at 18 years of age or older.

Identity Release Donor is generally considered advantageous for the child for several reasons. There are practical issues; for example, a child may need to know about medical history that has developed during the time after the sperm was donated. There are also complex emotional issues since many children feel a need to know more about their fathers (e.g., what does he look like? What traits did I inherit from him?). In addition, some children want to meet their donor siblings, either out of curiosity or for medical reasons.

Sperm Donor Screening Process

Sperm donation is regulated by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA). Sperm donors are required to be tested for certain infections and may also need to meet other criteria as determined by the sperm bank. Even though the FDA only requires that anonymous sperm donors be screened for risk factors and transmittable diseases, the American Society for Reproductive Medicine (ASRM) believes it is important that both anonymous donors and those known to the recipients undergo the same initial and periodic screening and testing process, such as infectious disease testing. Only a small percentage of men who want to donate sperm pass the screening process.

For women using donor sperm to get pregnant, sperm banks maintain donor profiles that provide basic information such as racial origin, skin color, height, weight, eye color, and blood group. Some sperm banks also require donors to provide medical histories. Depending on whether a patient chooses an anonymous donation or an open identity, the child will have the option to contact the donor in the future.

Once the sperm is available, based on the woman’s health and other factors pregnancy is usually achieved using intracervical, intrauterine or intravaginal insemination. Donor sperm can also be used in an IVF procedure to create an embryo that is then implanted into the woman’s uterus. With IVF women can also have the option of using a donor egg to achieve a pregnancy.

For lesbians starting out on a family building journey, many questions arise. We are here to help provide answers and solutions as your family building center

  • Where
    do I find a surrogate?
  • How do I look for a donor?
  • Is there a reproductive attorney that I can trust?
  • Who will carry the baby OR Am I fertile?
  • What will
    the medical process involve?

Starting the conversation is the hardest part. Begin with a complimentary consult.

  • Finance Packages

    Finance Packages

    Financial plans for surrogate mother costs, egg & sperm donors, IUI and IVF make the process more affordable.

  • Preferred Providers

    Preferred Providers

    Access our trusted preferred provider network of surrogacy, sperm donor, egg donor agencies and legal counsel.

  • Our Staff

    Our Staff

    We love what we do – helping LGBT couples or singles build their families. Patient Navigators assigned to each case help you every step of the way.

  • LGBT Community

    LGBT Community

    Hear from gay parents on their journey, get advice from the medical and legal experts and learn of LGBT family building events in your area.

  • Finance Packages

    Finance Packages

    Financial plans for surrogate mother costs, egg & sperm donors, IUI and IVF make the process more affordable.

  • Preferred Providers

    Preferred Providers

    Access our trusted preferred provider network of surrogacy, sperm donor, egg donor agencies and legal counsel.

  • Our Staff

    Our Staff

    We love what we do – helping LGBT couples or singles build their families. Patient Navigators assigned to each case help you every step of the way.

  • LGBT Community

    LGBT Community

    Hear from gay parents on their journey, get advice from the medical and legal experts and learn of LGBT family building events in your area.

Dr. Mark P. Leondires

As a dad with two kids through surrogacy, I am proud to share my expertise and insights with the LGBT community.

Dr. Mark P. Leondires,
Medical Director

Dr. Mark P. Leondires

Dr. Mark P. Leondires,
Medical Director

  • Nora Bolger RN

    Nora Bolger RN,
    Egg Donation Manager

  • Lisa Schuman

    Lisa Schuman,
    LCSW, Patient Support

  • Beatrice Abshire

    Beatrice Abshire,
    Financial Coordinator

  • Diana D’Amelio

    Diana D’Amelio,
    RPA-C, Physicians’
    Assistant – Surrogacy

Success Rates Matter 1

Our advanced reproductive technology and clinical staff deliver exceptional outcomes. Reproductive Medicine Associates of Connecticut’s Live Birth Rate is 22% higher than the national average.

Percentage of transfers resulting in live births.*

Table Lesbian

1 These statistics represent outcomes for patients who have undergone embryo transfer. The percentages are calculated by dividing the number of women who achieved a clinical pregnancy (numerator) by the total number who underwent a transfer (denominator) from January 1, 2013 to December 31, 2013. Please keep in mind that a variety of individual factors may increase or decrease your likelihood of having a baby. A comparison of clinic success rates may not be meaningful because patient medical characteristics, treatment approaches and entrance criteria for ART may vary from clinic to clinic.

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Starting the conversation is the hardest part. Begin with a complimentary consult.

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Convenient locations in NY and CT.